Feelings are temporary
There is a difference between “I feel I cannot do this” and “I cannot do this.” No matter what your feelings are, they are temporary and wont last forever. Whether its pain or fear or grief or ecstasy, no feeling will last forever. Feelings must never be allowed to direct the course of your choices. What feels good today might feel miserable tomorrow. What feels awful today might feel great tomorrow.
Hope vs Expectation
Hope= The Universe has my back
Expectation= If things dont go my way, I am screwed.
I personally feel that its good to make those choices where we know there is some hope for a better tomorrow. In my life, I ended up making choices which involved quitting jobs, leaving places and holding on to toxic relationships just because I was so afraid of letting go of my expectations. I wasnt disappointed in people or situations, I was disappointed in my own expectations.
Even if things are blurry and not clearly visible, deep within our heart we know where there is hope and scope for a better tomorrow. There is a really great question in the book “The Universe has your back” by Gabrielle Bernstein which says,” If I knew that I were fully supported by the universe, what would I do?”
Facts vs Experience
We all have so many people around us who fill up our heads with their own sob stories. They dont give us the real facts in raw form. They narrate experiences which are often disguised as facts.
For instance if someone says,” You know our new boss scolded me this morning for being just five minutes late. She even threatened to deduct my pay.” Thats an experience which portrays the boss as a mean and cruel person where the true fact might just be that your boss is all up for discipline and punctuality which is no big deal.
Go for facts not experiences no matter they are good or bad. Listening to experienced people and considering their advice is good. But making your choices on the basis of the horror stories or fairytales you have heard is not a smart choice. We all have our own unique ways of living our lives.
When life gives you pain, receive it.
There is a famous saying which says that we must choose the path of least resistance. I completely agree. But the path of least resistance may also be the most painful path. It might be the path where your deepest wounds are triggered and you feel the maximum amount of fear and grief. That might not be the case always but some times it surely is. And in those times, saying no to that pain and denying it or giving up because of it is not the right choice. Its only when we feel what we need to feel that we are able to surrender and surrender leads us to God.
“Truth is the disappearance of all options.” Matt Kahn.
When things are not going as we want them to go, when we feel that we are being pushed into hell, when no amount of spiritual practices can lessen our pain, when we feel weak and vulnerable, thats when we are aligned with our highest truth. In truth there are no options. Making decisions means choosing whats best for us. And whats best for us may not always be pleasant. Thats where we so often go wrong. We feel that whats best for us should make us feel good. But no, thats not always the case. Sometimes its only when we are pushed to our breaking point that we are transformed into someone new and better.
There is another popular question which says,” Who do I need to be to manifest the life of my dreams?”