Namaste beautiful souls. Thank you for reading, sharing and supporting my work. In today’s post I want to discuss about creating healthy and beautiful relationships so that we can live a better life. We all are dealing with some sort of stress with respect to our relationships. It maybe a simple argument we had with our parents, our kids might be having teenage issues, our spouse maybe giving us a hard time or our friends may not be enough supportive. Almost all of us face similar issues on a daily basis.
So, how do we create the perfect relationships? How do we better our relations to our loved ones? Its a very simple fact that everyone in our lives is a reflection of whats going on within us. This fact is better understood by some examples. So lets begin.
Suppose your mother is a very short tempered person. She yells at you for no reason. She gets irritated and annoyed on the slightest mistakes and she isnt very open-minded. In such a situation, usually the main source of your stress is that you are comparing your mother with an ideal mother. Your mind says,”An ideal mother doesnt yell that way. She teaches and not curses, she is supportive and has a good sense of humour. She helps her kids in learning from their mistakes instead of telling them that they are careless.” Now lets put this story aside. Ask yourself,”how is an ideal child supposed to behave in such a situation?” The answer is pretty simple. An ideal child must be a little more careful to avoid doing things which annoy his/her mother. An ideal child should not yell back or respond with anger. An ideal child should give her mother the space she needs being there for her at the same time. Now if you reverse the situation, you will realise that an ideal child creates an ideal mother.
Now, lets take some more examples. Suppose you and your father do not seem to agree on anything. Your father has his own opinions and he has no respect for your views. He is fed up of your thoughts and beliefs and always criticises you for the same. Instead of being upset about his behaviour, lets shift our focus on ourselves. An ideal child will continue to respect his opinions but will never underestimate her own wisdom. She will not initiate any conversation which can lead to unwanted arguments.
If you try to understand the above two examples you will see a similar pattern. We are upset because we want people to behave in a certain way which they dont. No matter what we do, the behaviour of others is not something we can ever control. But if we learn to keep our focus on ourselves, we can create a better life. We choose to become an ideal/better child because we no longer wish to suffer and we know that the only way to end this suffering is to create harmony within ourselves. An ideal child creates the ideal parents and vice-versa. So in whatever situation you are, if you choose to become a better person you are doing it for your own peace of mind.
“When another person is your source of happiness, to put it bluntly you are screwed.” Gabrielle Bernstein