“If someone is living rent-free in your head chances are you’re in a relationship that is still very active and alive for you because there is no closure and you’re the one keeping it alive.” Colette Baron Reid
Namaste wonderful souls. My warmest regards to all. In today’s post we shall discuss about getting rid of the hangover of toxic relationships and putting an end to all misery. I know that some of you are struggling to get over a relationship, be it a broken friendship or a partner with whom you have decided to part ways. You really want to end it all and welcome new and loving people into your life. But there is a problem here, you just cant get your toxic ex out of your head. Yes, thats what we are going to talk about today.
The rule is simple. Unless and until they are out of your mind, they wont ever be out of your life. You might have deleted their pictures, unfollowed them on social media and even blocked all contacts with them. But they are still there in your head haunting you the whole time. You may easily know this when every friendship song reminds you of your broken friendship or every romantic song reminds you of your broken heart or you just cannot be your usual playful and cheerful self again. A part of you wishes for them to come back. And they do. Toxic ex’s were the first ones to leave you alone when you were going through a weak phase in your life and they are the first ones to come back when you are back on your feet again. You surely do not want to give them another chance to ruin your life. And for that its extremely important to get them out of your heads.
First things first, its not an instant process. It takes time, dedication and patience to change a mindset thats not serving us anymore. To begin with, start by assuring yourself that you will overcome this. If you need help, you can consult a counsellor or a hynotherapist. You must start by forgiving yourself for making the wrong choice. None of us are born wise. We gain wisdom by our experiences. Self-forgiveness is the first step towards mental freedom. You can choose to be free in any moment by choosing love over fear. Facing your fears brings you relief and strength. Send love to yourself and calm down.
The next step is to learn to take things lightly. This involves getting rid of the fear of making the wrong choice again. We all have the right to make mistakes. Wisdon lies in not repeating those mistakes. Next, we are going to look at all those unhealthy habits which you have developed staying in their company. It can be an irregular sleep pattern, using foul language in usual conversations, adopting a short temper and so on. Getting rid of these unhealthy habits makes it easier for you to kick them out of your life.
The final step or you may take it as the very first step is to give yourself unconditional love. Know that you deserve the best and the very best people will enter your life at the right time. Right now, you are clearing up your mind, heart and soul to make space for them. Give yourself the love, care and attention you need. If you suffer from constant headaches due to stress, start a healthy yoga practice. Pick up a good comforting book to read. Start watching any shows or movies you like. And above all, spend some sacred solo time, light some incense, create some moments of silence and try to access the infinite source of relief which lies within you.
When such miserable things happen with us we lose our faith in the Goddesses. It seems really hard to trust them. A broken heart loses faith in the divine. But if in these weak moments of our lives, we push away the Goddesses, then we are being really unkind with ourselves. Put on some sacred songs and calm down. Try to access that sacred space within your heart which provides you relief. Take things slowly, one day at a time. Hurry creates worry and haste creates waste. Worry steals your joy and keeps you busy doing nothing. Let go of what you think you need and relieve yourself of all burdens. Surrender to love and you will see the difference.
“Freedom begins in the mind.” Grace Smith