When something goes wrong or we are stuck in extremely fearful and heart-breaking situations, we feel that we have been betrayed by God. We feel that he did this to us and we are suffering due to his actions. And then we do the worst, we push him away.
Faith is about believing that whatever has happened or will happen, good or bad, easy or hard, is for the highest good of all. Faith is trusting that in those bitter moments of pain and suffering, God will be there for us and with us.
We might not be able to see his plan, we may be unable to figure it all out, but we will have his shoulder to cry on, we will have his hand to hold and we will have his power to surrender to.
Compassion also includes not pushing God away when you need him the most. Be kind to yourself. Weep with him, cry in his arms and surrender all your miseries to him. Bearing this burden all by yourself and pushing him away is not a sign of strength. Blaming him for all your troubles is a sign of weakness. True strength lies in embracing his will and mourning in his embrace.
When you cry, you expect him to cheer you up. But he is there in your tears. His love flows out of your heart through your eyes and you sob till you are terribly tired. Crying takes a lot of your energy. And if you choose to cry alone, you are only adding to your sorrows.
What you lost was due to his love. What you gained was his blessing. Your suffering is a shower of lessons. Your pain is the medicine of wisdom. Your sorrow is the entry portal for light. But your hopelessness is a result of you pushing him away. Your numbing out is the fear to face your pain. You are not facing your pain alone. You are facing it in the light of his love. If the pain has bruised your heart, then his love within you will heal those bruises with grace and compassion.